I hate box elder bugs.

So I'm studying for the bar exam, which I am positive I will fail (more on this later), and when I need a break, I go outside and take a small spade and smash the shit out of box elder bugs. In case you don't know what they are, google them, find a picture, get grossed out, and then imagine a total and complete infestation in one area of rock at the house. And then imagine me running around with a spade with crazy messy hair, yelling and stomping and hitting things with it. That's me. And keep in mind that despite my stress from studying I'd probably still be acting the same way, because they are nasty and disgusting and I hate them.

Box Elder Bugs are seriously annoying as hell. They come out of the cracks of everything and can fly. Their main goal in life is to make me feel like they are crawling all over me any time I see one. And they can be super tiny to really big and that also grosses me out. Thinking about it makes me gag. That is why I squish them. Multiple homicides help me feel like a better person. Plus they make a lovely red color when I KILL THEIR GUTS, DEATH BY SQUISHING. It is fantastic, really.

But the fact they keep coming back and never seem to end really pisses me off, and how every time I come in the house I feel like they are all over me is so freaking gross that I CALL SHENANIGANS on them. gross gross gross.

Also I hate the bar exam. I am 99% sure I am going to fail and since I have no job lined up I guess it is no big loss. I am doing worse and worse on my practice things, my head feels like it is going to explode, and I am constantly on the verge of tears/a nervous breakdown/a postal rampage and probably will be until the bar is over. It is literally putting knots in my stomach that make me not want to eat. HOORAY INVOLUNTARY WEIGHT LOSS!

I don't know if I can handle this for much longer. I don't feel like I know enough to take the test and pass. I bust my butt and I know ZERO. I am sick and tired of studying but when I look up from my books I feel guilty as hell. I feel guilty right now typing this bullhonkey. What the balls.

So I CALL SHENANIGANS on you, bar exam. I am sick of this hazing ritual to try to get into a profession that no one respects anymore anyway. Oh yeah, lawyers are so great and cool. Awesome, I can't wait. Yeah, tell me another lawyer joke, and I'll tell you the great one about the lawyer who was unemployed and broke and had over $100K in student loans!! HAHA FUNNY! ISN'T THAT A GREAT ONE? Shut up, I will put you in a headlock and give you a noogie.

SHENANIGANS!

I hate this being on the edge all the damn time thing. It is driving me nuts and I am starting to bite my nails which I have not done for a very long time. The stress is KILLING me. Literally. I am fairly certain if I do not suffer a disabling panic attack or heart attack before the bar it will be nothing short of a miracle.

Also, sorry for the lack of posts. I have been busy. I'm not sorry, actually. I've been busy and enjoying my life. Besides, like you really wanted to listen to me bitch and moan anyway. Whatever. Call me when I'm not cranky...like after 4:00 pm on July 30.